When Life is Changed Forever, by Rick Taylor

The unthinkable has happened to my family.  The thing I prayed would never happen – my worst nightmare.  Our lives were plunged into instant despair.  We went from hopeful to helpless; from being excited about the future to lamenting that we had to face even one more day. The pain of our souls is felt in every part of us – our bodies, our minds, and our spirits.   While many books have been written on grief, and many specifically on the horrible grief a parent suffers when a child dies, there are no easy answers to be found.

I have read many books in the past 7 months since my son, Kyle, went home to be with the Lord – books about grief and books about heaven.  I’ve been looking for answers and trying to make all the columns in my head add up.  Most of the books I’ve read have been first person accounts of grief journeys, such as the book When Life is Changed Forever, by Rick Taylor.

Taylor, like me, is the parent of three sons.  Taylor’s son, Kyle, like my son, Kyle, was taken from his family tragically and unexpectedly.  During Taylor’s darkest days of grief, when he was looking for answers to his deepest questions, he searched the bible.  In this book he shares the answers he found to his questions.   Why did my son have to die?  Why does grief hurt so much?  What can be done to relieve the pain?

The book is comprised of three sections, Feeling Death; Facing Death; and Learning to Live Again, and two appendixes, Is There Really a Loving God?; and Empty Religions, which tells how the major world religions explain death, and what they believe comes after death.

In the process of answering the hard questions surrounding the death of his son, Taylor uncovers some misconceptions that many people hold about God and death, including some that he held.

Taylor states that it’s a common misconception that bad things do not happen to good Christians.  They do.  Pain is a part of life for everyone who lives in a fallen world. He refutes the idea that Christians with a strong faith don’t grieve.  We do.  Most Christians have planned for “after death” – the time when their families will all be together in heaven.  However, there is a time “during” death, explains Taylor, the time between when a loved one dies and when we might be with him or her again in heaven.  “The death of a loved one makes us deal with the unbelievable pain in the here-and-now.”

(Why did my son have to die?)  Taylor explains how death entered the world because of the fall of man.  Before the fall, God used to walk in the garden with Adam and Eve, but  once sin entered the world, Adam and Eve could no longer be in God’s presence. God could not allow Adam and Eve to eat from the tree of life out of mercy for them.  They, and we, would have spent eternity separated from God by our sin.

Everyone has to die, but why Taylor’s son?  Why at such a young age?  “I’m sure that God has a million perfect purposes,” states Taylor.  Taylor never questioned that Kyle was in heaven, well loved and cared for by his heavenly Father.  “Why did Kyle die?” asks Taylor.  “He died because of sin.  He died so he can live with His Father, closely, intimately, securely, forever.  This is our Father’s promise.  What a great place for Kyle to be.”

(Why does grief hurt so much?)  As the months went on and the weight of grief did not lighten, Taylor went to the scriptures to find out why he and his family hurt so badly.  What he found is that death is the enemy and it is supposed to hurt.  For his family, it was the end of their hopes and dreams for Kyle and the end of Kyle’s “aliveness.” They were separated – torn apart – from the son they dearly loved.  Taylor writes, “In a moment of time, life has been changed forever.  The closer we are to the one who has gone on without us, the deeper the hurt and the pain.  The wound left by death is severe.”

(How can the pain of grief be relieved?)  Taylor soon realized that God was not going to take the pain away but was instead going to change his life and him to be more complete, more of who God designed him to be, more of the person he so passionately longed to be deep inside.  He also learned that pain and joy can coexist. God would strengthen and purify Taylor’s faith and lead him to the “true joy and blessing and fulfillment that is found as we live through the difficulties in a trusting, dependent, “solid gold” relationship with God.”

Taylor points out that many people think they will have joy if they can accumulate enough things and avoid enough pain, but that is not how it works.  Only as we learn to live in faith, in a relationship built on trust and dependence on God, are we able to experience His joy and blessing.  Taylor had previously known this in his head, but he had to know it in his heart.

Due to his new-found dependence on God, Taylor has a greater-than-ever sense that God really is in charge.   He no longer gets overwhelmed by unexpected circumstances.  He has learned to trust that God will get him through every one of them.  “Instead of lightening our load, God wants to help us carry heaver loads,” states Taylor.

The real question for each of us to ask ourselves, Taylor believes, is whether we are going to trust God or not. “Are you willing to trust God when He says you should persevere through your pain?   When He says that He will enable you to become a more complete person on the other side?  Are you willing to accept pain as part of life, trusting God to lift you up, just as He promises?”

“Slowly I learned to pray that God would help me experience His joy in the midst of my pain.  I began to pray that our family could trust God more.  I asked for the courage to endure the pain and not quit.  I asked God to help us keep growing and maturing in our relationship with Him and with each other.”

Taylor resolved not to let death take any more than it already had from him and his family.  Death took Kyle, but death could not steal their joy of living or their ability to love again unless they gave them up.  “Death may relentlessly and ruthlessly steal away life, but it can never take away my choice of how to respond.  I must choose that personally.”  Taylor found that he needed to be open and willing to accept his heavenly Father’s comfort and care. Taylor admits there were times when he wondered if he would make it and that those were the times when he was resisting what God wanted to do in his life through his loss.

Taylor has learned to look to God as his only real stability and to look ahead to a glorious future.  “A day is coming when our Father will raise Kyle and me and our whole family along with all believers.  We will be with Him forever.  And we will be changed in many ways – thank God!  I look forward to that great reunion day when my Father lifts us up to a better life, forever, with Him.”

Amen.

The key take-away points from this book, for me, are…

*I can rest in the knowledge that Kyle is in a wonderful place, with his heavenly Father and is well-loved and secure.

*Death can not take any more from me unless I’m willing to let it go.

*God will draw me into a deeper trust and dependence on Him and a deeper relationship with Him.

*God will change me into a more substantial person and make my life more meaningful.

*God will show me how pain and joy can coexist.

Beware the Third Circle, By H.L. Ford

A job that requires investigating UFO sightings, crop circles and cow mutilations might be a nightmare of a career for some people, but not for Kaytie Flame O’Reilly, an adventurous reporter for Beyond Fantasy magazine. Kaytie is the main character in H.L. Ford’s suspenseful and captivating mystery,
Beware the Third Circle, the second book in her Beyond Fantasy series.

A bold and confident bible-believer, Kaytie specializes in reporting on supernatural phenomenon, often exposing deceitful schemes. Her self-stated purpose is to “shine a light on dark and deceitful doctrines which draw unsuspecting people from the truth.”

This also seems to be Ford’s purpose for writing this fiction series. She gives rational and biblical explanations for many of the mysterious and unexplained phenomenon that are present both in this work of fiction and in real life. The story is set in rural Missouri and contains actual reported phenomenons such as the mysterious Hornet spook light that appears on the Missouri/Oklahoma border.

In the first chapter Kaytie receives two warnings to avoid the third circle. The first warning comes from a self-proclaimed werewolf and the second from a fellow passenger on an airplane who claims to be in contact with aliens. It’s not until chapter 13 that Kaytie finally discovers the horrible meaning of the third circle.

Due to the nature of her job, Kaytie often finds herself in dangerous situations. Several of the scenes read like something from an Indiana Jones movie, with mudslides, caves, and bizarre pagan rituals. The action is non-stop as the heroine is stalked, kidnapped, locked in a trailer during a tornado, lost in the wilderness, drugged, and captured by UFO cultists.

Kaytie’s love interest is Dax Larue, a reporter from a rival magazine. Kaytie has feelings for the handsome and somewhat arrogant journalist, but chooses to squelch them, doing everything possible to discourage his advances. Things get complicated when Sheriff Tom Ogilby enters the picture and captures Kaytie’s attention. Tom seems to be everything that Dax is not – reliable, steady, and a Christ follower. Kaytie has no clue of the terrible choice she will be asked to make.

The book is written with lively and often humorous dialogue, most often between Kaytie and Dax, and has a multi-level mystery plot that will keep readers intrigued. The characters are colorful and unique. Frank Peretti fans will love Ford’s subject matter and her style.

So Long Insecurity, You’ve Been a Bad Friend To Us, by Beth Moore

Beth Moore states that her latest book, So Long Insecurity, is the closest she will ever come to writing an autobiography.  Moore admits that she has secretly struggled with insecurity all her life and sees insecurity as an epidemic in our culture.

Moore teaches women how to begin to be secure by exercising their power to choose and pleads with women to stop handing people the kind of power only God should wield over them.

“One of the most common human claims is that we can’t change the way we feel.  That may be true, but we can change the way we think, which will change the way we act.  And as we change the way we act, the way we feel also begins to change.”

Moore walks her readers through self-evaluation and helps them identify their own personal roots of insecurity.

One of the many roots of insecurity that Moore discusses is pride.  “I have come to the conclusion that we have no greater burden in all of life than our own inflated egos.  No outside force has the power to betray and mislead us the way our own egos do.  Pride talks us out of forgiving and steers us away from risking.”

Moore dedicates a whole chapter to fear because it plays a big part in insecurity.  “Insecurity lives in constant terror of loss. Insecure people are always afraid that something or somebody is going to be taken from them.”

Moore’s practical antidote to the superficiality that feeds insecurity is leading a life of purpose and learning to trust God.

Moore’s upbeat, lively style and her passion for women and the Lord all come together beautifully in this well-written, life-changing book.

Along with the launch of the book, Moore conducted her first online bible study.  For six weeks during the months of March and April 2010, women across the country met in groups to discuss the book and their answers to questions that Moore posted on her website.  The women were also encouraged to post their responses.

The study culminated in a nationwide simulcast on Saturday, April 24th with more than 300,000 women attending at host churches across the U.S.

If God Is Good, Faith in the Midst of Suffering and Evil, by Randy Alcorn

Most of us have either asked or been asked the question, “If God is good, then why is there so much suffering in the world?”

In his epic 495-page book, If God Is Good, Randy Alcorn tackles this monumental question.

This book will not give you a definitive answer for all the evil and suffering in the world – one doesn’t exist – put it will educate you on answers based on six standard worldviews and provide lots of information to help you decide which view you will adopt.

The six worldviews Alcorn discusses are: There is no evil and suffering; There is no God; God has limited goodness; God has limited power; God has limited knowledge; and the worldview that Alcorn proposes – God is all good, all powerful, all knowing – he hates evil and will ultimately judge evildoers, and remove evil and suffering after accomplishing a greater, eternal good.

Alcorn explains that because we are living in the era between the beginning of Genesis and the end of Revelation, “both Heaven and Hell touch Earth – an in-between world leading directly into one or the other.”

Alcorn states that this world has more good than evil and that we notice the evil because it’s the exception.

“God holds back the tide of human and demonic evil.  He infuses this fallen world with his goodness, restraining evil until the moment He brings final judgment.”

Alcorn explains that we are living in a fallen world and evil is a real part of our lives during this time.  However, God is still in control of the world and He will not allow anything to happen that He is unable to use for ultimate good.

According to Alcorn, God’s definition of good is whatever will bring the most people into His Kingdom and save them from an eternity in Hell.

“What tragedy that this present life is the closest nonbelievers will ever come to Heaven.  What consolation that this present life is the closest believers will ever come to Hell,” writes Alcorn.

Alcorn suggests that it is much better for each person to work out what they believe about God and the evil in the world before tragedy strikes so that they are not trying to do it while they are in crisis.

If you have ever asked or been asked “the question,” and are looking for answers, you just may find them in Alcorn’s book.

Deadly Disclosures, A Dinah Harris Mystery, by Julie Cave

Deadly Disclosures bridges a gap that often exists between well-written fiction and Christian fiction. This is a captivating, intriguing, suspenseful, and completely believable story that happens to have characters who, during the course of the tale, realize their need for a Savior.
The story is set in Washington D.C. and has many of the same elements that made The DaVinci Code so popular – powerful public figures in secret societies willing to do anything to further their cause. While both works of fiction deal with controversial religious topics, an important difference is that Julie Cave’s work presents factual historical events about a much-debated scientific and societal issue today – creation vs. evolution.
Cave presents the scientific facts in a fascinating way and brings to light the tension that exits between the two schools of thought.
The plot is well developed with twists that will keep the reader guessing. The main character is as mysterious as the storyline and the reader will be just as anxious to figure her out and to know what it is from her past that haunts her.
Cave has accomplished something that many authors have attempted and failed – to teach in the context of a great story.
Definitely a page-turner, this book will keep its readers up late into the night.
Cave wraps everything up with a satisfying ending. The only thing the reader is left wanting is the next Dinah Harris mystery.
The reader may still not be able to sleep once the last page is turned, however, because some of the issues raised in Deadly Disclosures may leave the reader a bit shaken, with much to consider and contemplate.

Already Gone, by Ken Ham & Britt Beemer w/Todd Hillard

The title “Already Gone” refers to the children and teens that are attending church regularly with their parents today but have already left the church in their hearts and minds.
The authors of this book have done extensive research and give statistics and reasons for the phenomenal exodus of young adults from the church.
The disconnection happens when students begin to question the full accuracy of the Bible and doubt that the Bible is the true and inspired Word of God.
Ken Ham, the president/CEO and founder of Answers in Genesis ministry, points out that Christians have not been educated in how to defend their faith and have changed what they believe about the bible to match what secular science has taught – that the earth is millions of years old and that evolution happened.
Many Christians see no problem with going along with these scientific theories and accept that God could have used evolution, and that 6 days of creation may not be 6 literal 24-hour days. Once we question one aspect of the Bible, Ham writes, the rest of it becomes questionable as well.
The solution Ham suggests is for church leaders and parents to educate themselves in creation apologetics (logical arguments in support of creation) so they are able to answer children’s questions when what they are learning in school contradicts the Bible.
“Most church-going adults cannot adequately defend the basics of their Christian faith or basic doctrines, let alone defend the faith against the skeptical questions of this scientific age,” writes Ham.
Ham is calling for a second reformation of the Church and believes that if we don’t take action now, Christianity in America will become extinct.
“We are one generation away from the evaporation of church as we know it,” states Ham, pointing out that this has already happened in England as well as the rest of Europe.
“Where Europe is today spiritually, America will be tomorrow – and for the same reasons, if the Church does not recognize where the foundational problem lies and address it,” states Ham.
This book contains serious warnings for every American interested in helping to preserve our country as a Christian nation. Already Gone needs to find its way into the hands of every Christian Educator, Church Leader, and Christian parent.

The Hidden Treasures of Our Trials, by Coraly Hanson

We have all been through difficult times in our lives.  The author of this book, Coraly Hanson, seems to have experienced more than her share of trials…abuse, death of a child, cancer…things that could make a person angry and bitter, forgotten by God.  But Hanson expresses none of these things.  Instead she has found that in the midst of difficult circumstances she is closer to God and more in awe of His love and power.
Through this study, you will learn to look at your circumstances from a new perspective and will reclaim your hope and faith.  Hanson offers encouragement by pointing to scripture and sharing examples from her own life of times disasters were turned into victories.
The book is written in a bible study format with eight lessons in which readers are asked thought-provoking questions that get to the heart of the matter.  By working through the lessons you will be working through your specific situations and applying scripture to your life.  This book would work well for a group bible study but is also effective for individuals.

Crazy Love, by Francis Chan

This book is a wake up call to lukewarm Christians to get busy and do something for the Kingdom.  We should not have the same worldly priorities as non-believers.  Chan offers a quote from Tim Kizziar, “Our greatest fear as individuals and as a church should not be of failure but of succeeding at things in life that don’t really matter.”

Chan is tired of Christians who say they are waiting to know God’s will for their life.  Chan reminds us of the brevity of life with a quote from Annie Dillard, “How we live our days…is how we live our lives.”  Chan challenges us to prove our love for God and others and to prove our faith by our good works.  He argues that we cannot say we love others (as we are commanded to do) if we let others suffer when we have the means to help them.

Chan states that what scares him the most are Christians who are lukewarm and just don’t care.   He writes, “The fact is that nothing should concern us more than our relationship with God; it’s about eternity, and nothing compares with that.  God is not someone who can be tacked on to our lives.”